Must have quick fix item

Dark circles under eyes? Razor burn? Varicose veins? Puffy bags under eyes? Cellulite?

As a female, we have experienced the above issues and they stress us out and irritate the crap out of us because they make us look less attractive. I have a quick fix secret that I make sure I ALWAYS have on hand. Ready?… hemorrhoidal Cream (ewwwww!!!). Creepy, maybe (but hey, it would only be nasty if you have actually used the tube for the intended purpose, right?) but it actually works and it works fast.

Dark Circles and puffy bags under eyes- The cream is meant to cool and calm an itchy bung bung (most creams contain an analgesic such as menthol that is very soothing). Rectal tissue is very sensitive, much like the skin found under our eyes so the cream can help calm those dark and/or puffy under eye circles. Be careful not to use too much too often, because a lot of the over the counter creams also include a steroid of some sort (GREAT anti-inflammatory, however prolonged use of topical steroids can have a thinning effect on skin making it more susceptible to sunburn. Ouch.)

Razor Burn- Whether it’s on the whoo-ha (can you say pain!?), legs, arms or armpits (face too?), it isn’t fun and it can be a real pain in the ass (pun on the hemorrhoid cream intended) to get rid of. Whip out your handy booty cream and gently rub it onto the razor burn. Once again, those nifty little analgesics will work their cooling magic to calm the bumps, anesthetics included in the ingredients of most creams will help to numb the pain and itch. The anti-inflammatory will also help to relieve swelling of irritated hair follicles.

Varicose Veins- This is what the cream is made for (after all, a hemorrhoid is a varicose vein where the sun don’t shine). If you have one (or two or three…) you know how much pain it can bring. Try rubbing the cream on while gently massaging in a circular motion, massages feel nice on painful varicose veins. 

Cellulite- I’ve even heard that the cream will help reduce cellulite. I’ve never tried it for this so I honestly can’t tell you if it works or not, but if it does Preparation H may just need to up their production.

Make sure to check the ingredients before you use ANY product to make sure you aren’t allergic. If you are on meds, check with your doctor before using to make sure it won’t interact with your prescription. This advice should not be used as medical advice.

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